Welcome To The Cradle Chronicles!

These are the crazy confessions of a novice mommy and her adventures in world "mom-ination." If you've followed my blog on PEOPLE.com/Babies, or read my new book Situation Momedy: A First-Time Mom's Guide to Laughing Your Way Through Pregancy & Year One, you're likely already familiar with my writing style and “Mommy-centric” blog fodder. If not, I'll introduce myself with this brief summary: Suffice it to say, I have kids. Two, in fact. Now, I’m not suggesting this defines me entirely, but it certainly goes a long way toward explaining my daily trials and tribulations with spit-up and dirty diapers. I also have five dogs, which throws some wacky canine parenting in the mix too. I hope you’ll continue coming back again and again for more of my motherhood anecdotes, and I look forward to hearing from you. If you haven't yet read "Situation Momedy," I hope you'll check it out! You can find a link for purchase under the "links" tab above. It makes a fun baby shower gift, even if you aren't a new mom yourself! The sequel, Situation Momedy: A Very Special Episode in Toddlerdom, is due to be released by Medallion Press in February 2017. Please feel free to follow me on Twitter and Instagram too!

--Photos in Welcome section courtesy of Mimosa Arts Photography--

June 26, 2015
Three's not a crowd, it's a cupcake!

Three’s not a crowd, it’s a cupcake!


I curse the saying Time flies.

No really, I’m a twitching, shouting at the moon, wishing-for-days-gone-by kind of mess over that phrase right now. Because time doesn’t just fly, it launches like Secretariat out of the gate and rushes past with no consideration for all of the moments we don’t have a chance to capture on photo, or video, or in our memory banks. It doesn’t let us press a pause or a rewind button, and the next thing you know, your itty bitty newborn (who was just teething and learning to crawl yesterday, I swear) is three-years-old. Three!

My baby turned three!!! And those three years flew faster than a Peregrine Falcon diving for it’s prey.

It is with great excitement and anticipation for the little girl she is becoming, mixed with great sadness for the baby she left behind, that we celebrated Gray’s third birthday. Mind you, she turned three almost a month ago, on May 21st, but the aforementioned time flies so damn fast that I woke up one day and realized I hadn’t put a blog out in over a month either. (Oops! And sorry!) Which brings another popular saying to mind too: Life is what happens to you while you’re busy making other plans. Touché, John Lennon, touché.

But back to the birthday… It happens that Gray was off from preschool that week, so I’d planned a small gathering with some of her friends. I reserved the little pavilion at a local park so the kids could swing and slide to their hearts’ content. We’d had a week of eighty-degree weather, so how crazy would I be to keep a bunch of toddlers locked up indoors? Cabin fever is no joke, people. Any opportunity to let my kid run off her energy (and perhaps that birthday cupcake) so nap time becomes an irrefutable afternoon staple, is an opportunity that I’d be a fool to turn down. Do ya feel me, fellow (exhausted) moms?

Well, go figure, Murphy and his law came in and tried to muck up my plans a bit.

It rained the whole night before the party, bringing the temperature down to a dank fifty-four-degrees and thoroughly drenching the playground. Sadly, it never warmed up before the party started. It also happens that a construction crew had shut down the road near the park we chose, and the pavilion was next to a jackhammer for the entire celebration. Super peaceful. But you know what? The kids didn’t care about any of that. We dried the wet equipment with towels I’d brought, and those kids ran around until they warmed up. It didn’t matter that a bulldozer was tearing up the ground nearby; the kids just shouted right over it. And so what if a few of her friends didn’t show up because of crappy weather? Gray didn’t notice. She was too busy shoving that chocolate cupcake down her throat, singing, playing games, dancing in circles, laughing, and sporting her fancy little party hat. My kid was beyond satisfied. Consequently, I might have been a chilly mama that day but I was also a very content one.


Happy 3rd birthday, Gray!

Happy 3rd birthday, Gray!


So… HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my sweet Gray! Thank you for gracing me with your beautiful spirit, your contagious laughter, your uncanny sarcasm (see my archived blog, Five Things That Make Me Think a 90-year-old is Trapped Inside of My 2-year-old’s Body, for more on that!), your wonderfully strong will and stubborn streak, and your unparalleled affection. Thank you for making the last three years pass by so quickly, despite my lamenting, because do you know what that means? It means we were having so much fun that it never slowed down long enough for us to notice. I’m so proud to be your mommy, and I love you stars and moon!


Until next time… Peace, Love, and Dirty Diapers,

Jenna von Oy

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